I have spent the last two weeks with company in my house. Two weeks which were like traveling through the past. I had a look at where I had been, at what had felt so right and, in the end, what had gone wrong. I was reminded of all the energy I had spent on things that didn't matter or never worked out. I realized again that I had been filled with the effort of trying but was never satisfied. And my emotions followed what I was experiencing, moving from happiness and hope to a kind of sadness all over again.
But I am alive and today is a new day and life is a gift, not an achievement. This year I am going to open myself to being new, to being fresh, to being unformed. I am going to, as much as possible, live without a road map or expectation. I will do what I can to nurture myself, to make silence and space be central to how I live... and I will be attentive. And of course, I will do my best to reduce my stash of yarn.
All life begins in darkness. Right now I can still feel the lingering shadow of the past clinging to me, but I am beginning to sense a instinctive movement towards the light... a soft tentative shift towards a new beginning.
5 comments:
good for you to look ahead and not behind. that is very healthy. we learn from experience, but don't have to dwell on it.
hooray YOU!!!!
no one can love you better than you can love yourself...surrender to that and get selfish about it.
new year blessings for every day of the year.
Such a lovely, inspiring attitude. Best of luck with your new beginnings :)
A soft tentative shift toward a new beginning...Wonderful words. They inspire a tender touch and a receptive soul.
Lovely post. I too am learning to focus on and love me more.
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