No pictures today...
I fly to Portland tomorrow. Need to be at my parents house at 4:30 a.m. to take us all to the airport. I think that means I need to be up by 3. Me-oh-my... that is early.
I have started back to school. Returned from New Mexico on Sunday and met 8th graders at my classroom door at 8:30 Monday morning. So far so good.
Funny, my attitude has undergone a shift, I think. Last year I spent nearly the entire time completely stressed out over whether I was going to stay in my job or retire, and right now I feel almost mellow.
I have no teacher's desk... they ordered a new one for me and took mine out, thinking the other would arrive before I did. Wrong. But I am completely not bothered.
My computer is not working... but then I have no desk to put it on... and I just look at it and kind of chuckle because I have noticed that someone has plugged it into a socket that I know from last year does not work.
I forgot how kindergartners are the first day of school. In the thirty minutes they were in my class I think I said "stay in your seat" about fifteen times, but by the end of the period when I asked them what my rules were, they chorused, "Listen and stay in your seat!" Of course it will be months before I can really get them to listen or stay in their seat... but they are beginning to get what I would like.
A little first grader cryed yesterday and today. He was here last year, but he has been home all summer, protected from the great big world of school. He told me between sobs that he was feeling "stressed out".
Today, at the end of the day, I thought, "Three days down..." and I told someone that when this year was done, I only had three more to go... if I actually got that far.
Also today, Cheryl told me they think her husband has lung and bone cancer... they are waiting for results. I talked to my sister and she is feeling cut out of her daughter's lives now that she has married and moved away, and her husband is not well either. Then I talked to my youngest who has been dealing with company and transmissions, and because she would like another baby and her husband does not, so today after she gave away their high chair she went to the humane society and got a kitty.... the kitty's name is Rocket. So tonight I have been praying for all these people who are suffering one one level or another... that some movement of the spirit gives them comfort and hope.
Some of this makes me wonder what am I waiting for? Am I waiting three years and one hundred and seventy-seven longer for my life to begin... but, you know... I think my life has begun... and it is going somewhere... and I just need to relax and be attentive to the ride.
Tomorrow I will be in Oregon with my parents and attending a wedding on Saturday. Who knows what interesting things I will encounter along the way.
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2 comments: first the little first grader being "stressed out." that is sooo funny (and kind of sad). And second, this passage from my new book, "Invisible Acts of Power" by Caroline Myss:
In every moment that goes by, some lesson or insight regarding the right use of power is available, if only we choose to see it... [letter from Nancy M.] "Where, indeed, is God? Is every prayer answered? Yes! I found him. He is in my ability to move through each day with grace and greet others with genuine interest and care, not feeling ashamed of my life. He is present in having found a solid yoga practice. He is present in my friendships, running buddies, walking buddies, visiting buddies. He's the reason I don't take Zoloft. He lets me feel the sadness, the fear, and the joy. He is present in Keb'Mo songs, Stevie Wonder, Van Morrison, Harvey Reid, and Kim Robertson. This is it - this is my life."
Love you
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